-8

I pressed delete.
There is no going back.
I need to get up.
I have been laying in bed for years.
I'm watching myself shrivel up.
I'm letting myself go.
I hate this place.
I think i'm going to leave.
I'm done with community college.
I don't want to hurt my mom.
But staying here is hurting me.
I know you can't run from your problems.
I know new problems arise where ever you are.
I know this. I really do.
But sometimes i just put that thought in the back of my head.
I just don't think about thinking.
I hate feeling like im in 10th grade again.
I hate looking at myself.
I hate feeling this way.
This is why i need to run.
I can't handle this.
I need one person to talk to.
i miss you.
I always run back to you.
You are my scapegoat, I've said this before.
I'm going to say it again and again.
I will never stop loving you.
Chew me up and spit me out.
again and again and again.
I want you to use and abuse me.
I need you close to me.
I just want your touch.
I don't care how i get that i want it, i need it.
I am lying.
This is all a lie.
I'm going to take this now.
I'll wake up in the night and fly to the moon.







xoxo